tithing...
For 2010, my new year’s resolution is to practice tithing. I told myself that I should give back to God 10% of whatever income I will earn. And I mean gross income. When I received a P10K honorarium for being BAC Secretariat last month, I was successful with my resolve. I was able to offer P1,000 to church one Sunday. And I was just too confident that it wouldn’t be hard to do it again. Ever heard of the saying, the first time is always the hardest?… It wasn’t very true for me. Though there was the tiniest bit of uncertainty in my heart, my resolve weighed heavier.
Today, I finally receive my first ever salary with DBP as a regular employee. The total salary amounted to P22K plus and I am overwhelmed. I waited for this for more than a month. The bills I need to pay are piling up faster than ever. As I was going over my list of bills to pay, I came across the word TITHE. Ten percent wasn’t it? That would mean around P2K. Summing up everything, I realized that there would be nothing left for my planned trip to Davao this weekend. I was planning to surprise Boboy with a movie treat and a modest dinner for V-day. But that would be just wishful thinking for now. I must admit that I am tempted to just keep the money allocated for my tithe and go on with my Davao trip. God would understand. But every time I think about doing it, I feel this heaviness in my heart. Huh! So much for thinking that the second time would be peanuts! I guess that it would be so easy to do tithing if you have more than enough. But having not quite enough ( I think!) for your needs is a different story.
Too much realization is dawning on me right now by just thinking about not having enough and yet, sticking to my resolve of tithing:
1. It is my biblical duty to tithe. God is expecting me to be just like the widow in the gospel who gave everything that she had for the church and in the process relied on His infinite goodness and divine providence. In short, trusting God her life. I now realize that tithing is more than just giving back to God what He has given you. It is the greatest way of showing God that you trust Him. That you believe He is for real. That He will take care of everything for you.
2. The will to tithe is not rooted from one’s inner self. It is a grace from God himself. I find it so difficult to forego with the thought of dropping out of my resolve and just spend my earnings on the things that my family need so I prayed, Lord, give me the grace to accomplish what you have instructed me to do. For without your grace, I find myself succumbing to temptations.
3. Contentment comes from knowing and believing that God will provide for everything even if all the circumstances/situations around you dictate otherwise. I could not exactly explain the thought that came to me when I first practiced tithing (that P1000 from the BAC honorarium). When I set that amount for my tithe, I knew that I have other needs waiting to be satisfied. But instead of being uncertain about tithing, what came to my mind was the thought that, that’s all for now. Those other needs will just have to wait for the next round of blessings. And surprisingly, I felt this deep feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction. Contentment at its best, I must say. So I realized that if only we believe that God will provide for our needs, we could be sure that contentment is not at all hard to come by. Most people would find this ridiculous. After all, the world made us believe that we must never be contented of what we have or we won’t have more. Now, I know, it is only us who made life really complicated… who made contentment so hard to grasp. For all we know, contentment is just around the corner.
I am not saying that with all these realizations, the practice of tithing will now be easy for me. I still believe that there will be times when it will become more difficult, but I am praying that God will give me the strength and grace to hold on to His promise of never ending providence and love. I am praying that He will see me through this biblical duty called TITHING.
So help me God.
Today, I finally receive my first ever salary with DBP as a regular employee. The total salary amounted to P22K plus and I am overwhelmed. I waited for this for more than a month. The bills I need to pay are piling up faster than ever. As I was going over my list of bills to pay, I came across the word TITHE. Ten percent wasn’t it? That would mean around P2K. Summing up everything, I realized that there would be nothing left for my planned trip to Davao this weekend. I was planning to surprise Boboy with a movie treat and a modest dinner for V-day. But that would be just wishful thinking for now. I must admit that I am tempted to just keep the money allocated for my tithe and go on with my Davao trip. God would understand. But every time I think about doing it, I feel this heaviness in my heart. Huh! So much for thinking that the second time would be peanuts! I guess that it would be so easy to do tithing if you have more than enough. But having not quite enough ( I think!) for your needs is a different story.
Too much realization is dawning on me right now by just thinking about not having enough and yet, sticking to my resolve of tithing:
1. It is my biblical duty to tithe. God is expecting me to be just like the widow in the gospel who gave everything that she had for the church and in the process relied on His infinite goodness and divine providence. In short, trusting God her life. I now realize that tithing is more than just giving back to God what He has given you. It is the greatest way of showing God that you trust Him. That you believe He is for real. That He will take care of everything for you.
2. The will to tithe is not rooted from one’s inner self. It is a grace from God himself. I find it so difficult to forego with the thought of dropping out of my resolve and just spend my earnings on the things that my family need so I prayed, Lord, give me the grace to accomplish what you have instructed me to do. For without your grace, I find myself succumbing to temptations.
3. Contentment comes from knowing and believing that God will provide for everything even if all the circumstances/situations around you dictate otherwise. I could not exactly explain the thought that came to me when I first practiced tithing (that P1000 from the BAC honorarium). When I set that amount for my tithe, I knew that I have other needs waiting to be satisfied. But instead of being uncertain about tithing, what came to my mind was the thought that, that’s all for now. Those other needs will just have to wait for the next round of blessings. And surprisingly, I felt this deep feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction. Contentment at its best, I must say. So I realized that if only we believe that God will provide for our needs, we could be sure that contentment is not at all hard to come by. Most people would find this ridiculous. After all, the world made us believe that we must never be contented of what we have or we won’t have more. Now, I know, it is only us who made life really complicated… who made contentment so hard to grasp. For all we know, contentment is just around the corner.
I am not saying that with all these realizations, the practice of tithing will now be easy for me. I still believe that there will be times when it will become more difficult, but I am praying that God will give me the strength and grace to hold on to His promise of never ending providence and love. I am praying that He will see me through this biblical duty called TITHING.
So help me God.
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